Our Bridge teacher said, "I'll diagram this on the board for you so you'll understand," to which the class replied, "No, we won't. Don't bother."
"Oh, come on," teacher persists. "East leads with the 10 D because it's the fourth in his longest and strongest and challenger ruffs it with a low trump so that later he can get back to the board to develop clubs. If he doesn't develop clubs now everyone knows he'll go down by three."
No one (at least in our class) "knows he'll go down by three." We understand the basics but that's about it. Most of us are still trying to figure out how to use the bid boxes.
When we finally get to play a hand the teacher roams around the room barking, "No! That bid is wrong! You haven't counted your quick tricks, have you?"
"Umm, no. But you said if we had 13 high card points, no doubletons and a four card suit we should ..."
"MAJORS! I said that only counts if you're playing in the majors!" shrieks teacher.
No wonder people drink when they play this game.
